- The industrial strength garlic in the pasta carbonara I had for lunch.
- The dog is snoring like a moose and drooling on my pillow.
- I can’t turn off my brain!
- I’m hot.
- I’m cold.
- I need sex so bad my cavities ache.
- Memory . . . all alone in the moonlight . . . I can smile at the old days. What Broadway musical was that darn song from . . . and why am I craving salmon?
- I have restless lego syndrome (my inner child still can’t fit all the pieces together).
- I’m hungry.
- I ate too much marbleized meat at dinner.
- I went to that damn movie Contagion.
- Did I eat infected cantaloupe in that over-priced fruit salad I had in the cafeteria yesterday? OMG, do I have listeria?
- I’m not the least bit superstitious— but there will be NO #13.
- My Visa bill is due in two weeks.
- Charlie Sheen.
- The fact that I actually know who Snooki is . . .
- Knowing that the Kardashians are laughing all the way to the bank.
- My young boyfriend.
- My young girlfriend.
- Your husband (he won’t stop calling me).
- I drank a pot of regular coffee after 5:00 p.m. and now I can’t close my eyes. I may have to tape them shut.
- The national debt.
- Realization that Cher disturbs me a whole lot more than Chaz.
- Knowing that there is one more slice of chocolate birthday cake left in the fridge (and it’s got my name on it).
- Space junk is gonna fall on my face any day. I just know it.
