Forrest Gump said it best: “Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re going to get.”
Our first child was born in December, 1968, a bundle of perfection. Ten little fingers, ten little toes. Perfectly shaped head, covered in black hair; dark grey eyes took in the world.
My husband, a barber by trade, was home Mondays. He cared for our daughter, diapering, feeding, bathing, playing. It was uncommon in those days for a daddy to be so hands on, but he was and he loved it. As caretaker for our apartment complex, Mondays were “fix-it” days around the complex. She went everywhere with him, “helping”. By age two, she knew the difference between a Philips-head screwdriver and a flat-blade. A bond was forming that would only deepen over time.
The years passed and the little girl grew into a teenager. Difficult days, but that father/daughter bond continued, although stretched at times as each struggled to understand the other.
Roland, my husband, would often ask, “What’s the matter with her?” What did I do/say wrong?” This inevitably came after an argument that escalated into a shouting match, with “Ann” racing from the room to her sanctuary, slamming the door with the words “You just don’t understand!” hanging in the air.
“She’s a teenage girl”, I’d reply as if no other answer were needed.
These episodes were interspersed with periods of calm, as they’d found another common interest-horses. When there didn’t seem to be anything else that they could talk about, there was always horses.
They both rode and loved it. “Ann” spent hours at the barn, helping her dad muck out stalls, cleaning tack, it didn’t matter the chore. If it was “horsey”, she was all over it. They could talk horses for hours, and often did.
When a job opportunity forced a move to the city, the horses were sold. Still the bond remained, although as Ann grew into young adulthood she was homeless. She was growing in other directions, a natural occurrence. At age nineteen, she moved to Minneapolis, enrolled at the University of Minnesota and began her “real” adult life.
