I have these pictures in my closet where I write. A big board with a hodgepodge of clippings and pics of people and places that I have loved, randomly pinned in no particular order.
Things that inspire me. Sketches of my life, snippets of my history. A picture of Hotei, a Buddhist god, my friend Tara painted. A card of a bulldog wearing punk rock studded bracelets that she sent me.
A picture of a Susie Homemaker chick from the 50’s holding a cake that reads, “BITE ME” that my friend Kristin sent me somewhere around the time I was diagnosed with MS. A copy of my first published story.
This board holds many things that represent many friends and many periods in my life. Not all of my history has been pretty. Some of these memorabilia are dark; from darker times when I couldn’t quite find my way out of the tunnel. But, they also represent times when faith stepped in, and led the way. I don’t ever want to forget those moments, or how far I have come, or how my faith almost literally carried me during these times.
My favorite picture is a picture of my late friend Vince at eighty-six years old. It is carefully placed at the top right of this board. Precisely positioned so that he is always looking down at me as I write. In the picture he is sitting on the steps at his home on Cutler St. in Newark, just a few blocks from St. Lucy’s Church where he was christened as a child. I used to go there with him, and we would sit, and listen and hold hands. He was old and ready to pass, I was young and lost. For some reason, in that time and place, we needed each other. We were the best of friends.
Vincenzo Carnevale. He never married. He went to Georgetown on a track scholarship. He was fast. He was old-school Newark Italian. He loved his mother. Sometimes I can’t sleep because I lay in bed, trying to remember what her name was. He talked about her all the time. Rochetta? He thought it was the most beautiful name in the world. Mid-conversation, his mind would float away, and he would roll her name off his tongue like it was satin. Rochetta.
